Father's Day

This Sunday is Father's day. To all those who are fathers of children young and old, Happy Father's day. Our boys are growing up fast and I remember the days when they were waiting for dad to come home and would welcome him home with tales of their days, toys, pictures, and buildings they were playing with when he arrived. I look back on one particular Father's day when the boys decided the were going to cook "Iron Chef" style for their Father's day meal for dad. They had fun planning and preparing the food that Father's day and it was a great day.

The role of father has changed for my husband now that our oldest son is nearly 21 years old. Tony has a 1972 VW bug that is always needing extra love. Mike has received many calls about this classic car and through the phone calls been quite pleased with the experience Tony has gained in his short BUG ownership. There is a mutual respect for the man each one is and the changing relationship between them.

The man I married certainly is an incredible father to these boys and I have to state that I am glad they have many of his great qualities.

Happy Father's day

Taking care of the written word,
dannielyn

Depression, Anxiety, and Anger

I researched a case study on depression and anger which was enlightening as there is a controversy as to whether anti-depressants will work on an individual with mild to moderate depression. The situation involved a college student who had realized he was depressed but was unable to determine the source of the depression. The student could not motivate himself to get up and go to classes or anything else in his 'life'. He was sad and confused as to why he was depressed.

There are many times when we find ourselves feeling unmotivated and sad because we are feeling so unmotivated. We often do not think that we are depressed when we feel sad and unmotivated but we could be in the midst of a round of depression. There is help for depression and with that help one can come back from living in a world that feels apart from the rest of our family and friends. This case study spoke about how 'sometimes' anti-depressants are not needed, changes in the individual's lifestyle is often the best plan of treatment. I agree.

The case study also mentioned anger. Anger is often a response when someone is unable to fully form what they feel in a manner that is productive. I understand this concept well. Over the last few months I was severely sleep deprived and suffering from anxiety issues that deteriorated the quality of my life. I was very angry and I certainly met the criteria for moderate to severe depression. Yesterday I wrote a post about Living Well is the Best Revenge and it was a creative outlet to express how different I feel today as compared to a week or month(s) ago. This is to say that sometimes when you are in a difficult situation it is best to remove yourself from that situation and the relief of the symptoms is nearly immediate. The night we moved from the house I began to feel the symptoms of anxiety and depression begin to lift from my body. It was not all of the symptoms, but the ability to relax took over slowly. Over the days, more of my ability to relax and avoid the anxiety symptoms increased. I do not feel as tense, anxious, angry, and depressed.

Anger is an emotion that makes all the sense in the world when we are in the middle of the emotion, but when we look back on our words and actions during an angry moment or episode we are left with many surprises. We say and do things that are completely 'off the wall' and outside our normal behavior. We show a side of ourselves that we would normally be ashamed to do in front of others. We believe we are justified in our words and actions only to be shown later how embarrassing it is in the light of day. We become obsessed with our anger and the righteousness of our anger and then we see how much of a 'butt' we have become.

I am glad to put the chapter of our lives behind us from the 'last house, landlord, and neighbors' as that is a situation filled with physical and emotional issues that was damaging our family and my emotional state. As I stated yesterday, we are living well and that certainly is the best revenge and the easiest. You see, now I am able to look back and reassess what I need to do to avoid this type of situation from happening again. I am protecting my sanity by letting go of the anger that was very present every moment of every day while living there. I am able to breathe without having an anxiety attack when I think of the situation I lived in and that is a great improvement. The anger is gone and in its place is thoughtful reflection. I can live each day without an anxiety attack and that is certainly a benefit to letting the anger go. This is due to the fact that I know the truth of our situation and in that truth is peace. I certainly hope that the neighbors can let go of their anger before it causes them any more damage or trouble. I for one can attest that the anger is physically and emotionally draining and bad for you.

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

Virtual Writing Lab

http://virtualwritinglab.com/This site is about to go live and I am so excited. Check it out and you will see why! I have been assisting students edit their papers for a few years now. I have worked with students who speak languages other than English as their first language. Their writing style is disjointed and does not flow properly and I have been able to edit papers for high school, university, masters, and doctorate level students. I recently edited and formatted a journal article for doctor from Egypt for an Egyptian medical journal. I loved to be able to hear back from the clients and find out that their work was accepted for publication and appreciated the work that I did to prepare the work for publication. I helped a military social worker write a grant for community health services for PTSD, TBI, and military family support services, a worthy cause that needs to provide the after care to the men, women, and children who are in the military.

I have to admit that one area of this 'assistance' that bothers me the most is the need for students in the United States from the United States having so many issues with writing a proper paper. I am not stating that the education system is failing our students, because I know that some students are not 'writers' but excel in another area of academics. I believe that if we can assist the students in editing the papers they will begin to recognize the value of the written word.

http://virtualwritinglab.com/

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

Living Well is the Best Revenge!

Last week our family moved yet again. The house we lived in had a number of problems that the landlord refused to address properly before and after we moved in. We had just experienced a horrific experience with a previous landlord that made me fearful of saying anything negative about the condition of the house. Yet, there were blatant and horrific issues with the house, but I was afraid to say anything about it. If the situation was not what it was that Friday morning when I arrived to get the keys to the house, I would have refused to move in. The condition of the house that morning was not the same condition the house was when my husband and I agreed to move in. It was nothing as we agreed and we had no option but to move in that day.

In February of this year the two story side of the duplex was rented and the new neighbors had two small yappy dogs, a Turrets Syndrome style yeller in the morning, he also slammed the door constantly, stood in our yard in front of our windows, hung three wind chimes in front of my bedroom window, had guests stand in my yard by my windows at a house warming party calling me a "B" because I asked them to move away from my yard and windows taking their cigarette smoke with them. They hollered at midnight on the other side the bedroom wall scaring the daylights out of me as I was startled awake. The Turrets syndrome yelling every morning between 6:15 and 7:30 am also startled me awake. The stomping up and down the stairs, slamming the dryer and washer doors at midnight and early morning only added to the lack of sleep, anxiety, and depression that I was experiencing. I know, I could take a nap during the day to make up the sleep. No, I couldn't. The dogs would bark at every little noise, she was home during the day and would sit in her bathroom and talk loudly to the dogs and I could hear everything. The dogs would attack the shared wall, bark, and when her husband came home he would slam the door right outside my bedroom door.

I wrote a note asking them to take care of the dogs, chimes, terrets, and the standing in our yard. Their answer was to write a note back (I never read it), write a note to the landlords (I never read it the copy they gave us), take down the wind chimes, CONTINUE TO SLAM THE DOORS MORE THAN BEFORE, AND HANG A BRIGHT YELLOW DON'T TREAD ON ME FLAG RIGHT OUTSIDE MY BEDROOM WINDOW!

The flag was put up to annoy me. However, it had the opposite effect. It made their seeing into my window more difficult. I could also sit on my porch and they could not see out their door directly at our porch. It provided more privacy than we had before. The night we left they took it down and when my husband and son went back a couple hours later to get a few last cleaning tasks done it was down. We also found out that they block our second exit from the house with 'junk'. We could not open the door and in the event of a fire, we would not have been able to exit our home.

By the time we moved I could not eat hardly anything at all. Despite the fact that I need to lose a bunch of weight, I needed to be able to eat. I had begun gagging and dry heaving every time I felt any bit of stress and I was constantly nauseous. I was always angry and agitated. I had anxiety attacks all the time, hated being in the house but couldn't go outside because of the neighbor situation. My life was deteriorating to such a degree that I was a wreak inside and outside the house. The house condition on the inside made me ill (mold and other gross issues) and the neighbors made being in or out of the house impossible to tolerate.

The neighbors believe they ran us out of the house and that is true, they did. But thank God they did. The home we moved into is not perfect but by golly, it does not stink, the carpet does not make you gag, the bedrooms do not feel damp and stink, there is no mold in the kitchen, bath, living room, etc. We do not have rude and inconsiderate neighbors who get off on tormenting others in passive/aggressive manners. Our lives are not at risk in the event of fire by blocking our second exit. I realized when we moved in here that living well is best revenge. They may be happy they 'ran us off', but those neighbors are living with a home that floods when it rains, has mold growing every where in the walls, base boards, and everywhere. Those neighbors have to deal with landlords that do very little to the homes and complain every moment they are asked to fix anything. The neighbors are paying the same or more than we paid for rent every month (depending on the final reduced rent amount advertised). We had 1600 ft and they had 708 ft home. Ya know, just got to laugh about that one!

But we are happy here. We are away from the neighbors that tormented us, the home that was physically harming us and we are living well. We are happy to be away from that home and no matter what evil parts of my mind wanted to do something to get back at them, I feel great satisfaction that the best revenge is living well. And we are!

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

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Our Boys, Success in Education, Success in Life

Andrew was inducted into the National Honor Society in November 2011 at North Henderson High School. We are very proud of our son who seems to be able to understand and do well in his classes all throughout his school career. Even in high school, he has been able to remain at the top of his class and well, we would love to take all the credit, but we know that it is in no small part Andrew and the collection of great teachers that he has had the fortune to encounter throughout his educational pursuits.

Tony is in his second year of college at University of North Carolina Charlotte. He is mid-way through his sophomore year and is at a junior level standing in his Political Science and English double major with a minor in History. Yes, it is obvious that I am slightly proud of my son. Just this weekend we received notice that Tony was nominated for the National Society of Leadership and Success at UNCC. We are thrilled to know that our son, who has always shown leadership skills even way back in first grade is being recognized for this natural quality.

I just wrote in a previous posting about friendships and what the group of friends you hang out with in school says about you. Tony and Andrew have been in the midst of many different students and have had various interests in school. Both have shown leadership, compassion, intelligence, athletic abilities, dedication, loyalty, and humor. They have also demonstrated the ability to be human by making mistakes and learning from those mistakes. They are not perfect, but this mother feels fortunate that their less than perfectness has been so very mild compared to the problems and situations others have experienced. I know that we (dad and I) have been instrumental in this role of raising these boys to turn out as well as they have, but I also know that it has a lot to do with the role Christ has in their lives as well.

My college aged son, Tony started going to church while at school, reading his bible, and posting bible verses to remind himself of what he needs to do to remain on the right path. Did I mention he is doing this not because he was forced to by parents but because he wants to?  Yeah, that is incredible and wonderful and humbling. This young man has the opportunity to drink alcohol and do whatever else he wants as he is away from home and yet, this is the life he chooses to live.

I am not putting the boys on a pedestal. I know all too well the truth of my boys. Just ask me about the van, December 23, 2011, and the long in coming truth, taking responsibility, and influencing younger brother in the wrong manner in which to go. (Sounds bad huh? it was really only side-swiping the guardrail on a very curvy mountain road, which could have been very dangerous and deadly, not admitting it, telling younger brother to not tell, and being mad that he was caught). Dad and I had not been upset when the van had been involved in a previous accident to the tune of $14,000 and gave no cause for the situation that happened, yet our son made a mistake in hiding from the truth. The fact that both of my boys were alive matters more than the damage a side-swipe caused. Hopefully the boys will remember this point and find that the truth of the situation is more important because their lives are more important than a vehicle.

Anyways, we are proud of our children's success in education but more importantly, we are proud of our children's success in their lives, particularly their life with Christ.

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

Friendships, choosing wisely and avoiding foolishness

Yesterday at Biltmore Baptist Church East Campus, the second relationship discussed was of friendships. Pastor Frank started off by talking about the cliques in high school, you know druggies, jocks, brainiacs and so on. He discussed how we are not far from these groups even out of high school. For example, if we hung out with the druggies in school chances are we still were with those types of people. If we enjoyed the company of the jocks, we were still doing sports as we aged. If we hung out with Christians, most likely we were still with Christians. Sounds good so far.

Proverbs is full of words of wisdom on how to develop relationships specifically friendships. One thing that caught me in the message was Pastor Frank's admission that often those who leave you most vulnerable in times of trials, tribulations, desperation, and when you make a mistake are the 'church' friends you develop. Yep, I know for a fact this is true. I have been used and abused by some of the most 'godly' appearing women. Here is the key to the problem, GODLY APPEARING WOMEN. They only appeared to have a heart for God. They only appeared to care about other women. They only appeared to want to be there for other women, until their needs were met or their patience wore thin.

Isn't that the truth of most Christian relationships? What can I get from this relationship? Whether a source for all sorts of gossip, assistance to make one look better in front the entire church for completing yet another daunting task, or simply to have another person in their 'clique', many of us have suffered through the pain of a Christian friendship.

How much hurt must one suffer through from your fellow Christians when you are already suffering? It seems that the pain and struggles from life is not enough to be able to rely on the support of your fellow Christian when they drop you as a friend without hearing the excuse "I am a saved SINNER". Well, here's one for the record books, so am I. Yet, I am struggling to overcome that excuse and build upon my weaknesses with the help of Christ. I do not wish to wallow in the 'saved sinner' excuse but to become a child of God, worthy of love, acceptance, grace, and mercy.

If we have no other reason to change other than we are saved, then why hang onto the saved sinner excuse. Why do we want to use that as a 'convenient truth' to excuse our behavior. I would rather hear someone say, "I am flawed in this area and I need you to hold me accountable as I hold you accountable". Is that not what the word of God tells us to do? He does not tell us to make excuses but to hold ourselves to a higher standard of living. He tells us to hold our fellow Christian to that same standard in the context of accountability with another Christian. This is not an excuse to blast all Christians with their sins, but to walk together with another Christian, two by two in order to be more than an excused 'saved sinner'.

The following verses will support this claim: Proverbs 13:20, 17:17, 27:10, 16:28, 17:9, 27:6-7, Hebrews 10:24, Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, Thank you Pastor Frank for sharing these yesterday.

Friendships are difficult to begin and even more difficult to continue due to our sinful nature. It is with the encouragement and honesty of a fellow Christian friend we find our friendship grow and develop. Never more true is this when we fail to find that Christian friend with a desire to give of themselves for the furthering of God's will.

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

Honor Your Parents, Clearing Up the Confusion

Our family attended the first service of Biltmore Baptist Church East Campus this past Sunday. We had been to the original Biltmore Baptist, but not since Pastor Bruce Frank had become the new pastor. Pastor Frank was starting a new series on "The Five" Making your critical relationships work. The first of the five relationships to discuss was the parent/child relationship.

For many years I have struggled with many well-meaning but wrong Christians who believe that a child must take whatever crud a parent hands out in order to honor the parent. I had been told by three separate 'pastors' or religious leaders that honoring your parent does not mean putting up with the same crud all the time from your parents. Pastor Frank repeated that sentiment but he also backed it up with solid biblical teaching.

Honor according to the bible means to respect, revere or show reverence, obey, and having heavy/weight (in regards to the instructions they present to another person).

Honor DOES NOT mean grovel, desperately seek approval, does not mean to make yourself vulnerable to their hurtful ways, behaviors, or words, it does not mean to deny the wrongs they committed in your past in an effort to control you still.

In June it will be eight years since our family moved to North Carolina from our family and friends in Iowa. We had been attending a bible study that dealt with the hurts, habits, and hangups we received from our families. It was NOT A BLAME YOUR PARENTS FOR EVERYTHING type of study. It explained how one can learn from the hurts and move on with your relationships. Our family tried very much to do this with both sides of the family. I will not explain all the hurts that we experienced, but most Lifetime movies do not cover all the issues we have had to deal with in a week's worth of movies. The 'stuff' was severe and it was not only in our childhoods, but it was still happening. We decided that if we could not deal with the 'crud' still happening while we were minutes away from our families, then we would move to another state and hope the distance will assist the resolution of the issues.

Happily, some progress has been made, but sadly, not a whole lot with the most important relationship of my life growing up, with my mother. I will be honest, I could list page after page of all the things she did that I did not like, but let's face, my boys could do the same. I COULD ALSO LIST PAGES OF ALL THAT SHE DID RIGHT AND ALL THAT I RESPECT HER FOR, but sadly, only the negative things would be remembered by her if she ever saw it. She would not realize that I want a relationship with her but it cannot be toxic. It cannot be filled with guilt trips, silence, blame, bad mouthing, and lies. It has to be an honest relationship and it has to be a relationship that desires to move forward. At this time, it is not ready to move forward.

I am a very complex person and I know that very few people actually desire to find out more about me because that is human nature. Take what you see and do not bother to spend too much time investigating the truth of the person. One person may find me very funny and another very quiet and reflective. One may find me honest and another may find me holding back from them. It is because I have been hurt so many times, very hurt and no one cared to actually care about me.

This is not a pity party for me, I am simply stating that I do not believe anyone on this earth has a clue as to who I am and what I am about. Not my mother, not my father, husband, or children. No one has really made an effort to get to know me and that is really heartbreaking.

I am not in the midst of deep despair however, I know that fortunately or unfortunately as the case may be, God knows everything there is about me that the others do not care to know. He does not base his knowing on assumptions (rightly or wrongly assumed) but based on who I am in my heart.

That is why, I am putting myself out there once again to my mother and telling her to stop with the games, guilt, manipulation, and all the other things that have been going on for too long and get to know me. Find out why your games (literal games) on Facebook when you could have been talking to me upset me --like when you chose the facebook games over me to spend time with regularly. Why your forwarded emails about stupid stuff (send this out and you will get so much back in return emails) bothered me because you could have written to me or asked me about the boys and carried on a dialogue. Instead, a Christmas or birthday card with your standard guilt trip line was all we received.

I honor you mom because of all that you have done right in my life. The recipes you taught that my children love to this day, the skills and experiences you shared with me that made me love you so much are shared with the boys whether they realize it or not. However, I cannot allow the hurt to continue by making myself vulnerable to your hurt all the time.

Taking care of the written word,
Dannielyn

Peel Away Stress and Leave Beautiful Skin

Hey everyone, I received a sample of a Montagnue Jeunesse facial mask, Passion peel off and I loved it! I remember when I was a little girl my mom would have a peel off mask like these and I had so much fun with mom using them. These masks are great for your skin and the environment which makes it the best product to use. I received my sample as a part of the Holiday Voxbox and I am so glad I was able to try this product and stroll down memory lane at the same time. Talk about destressing!

Montagnue Jeunesse

Fun, pampering beauty treats

Whether you enjoy looking after your skin, being pampered, or indulging in some me-time, be it alone or with friends, you will absolutely enjoy one of these ‘Life Little Pleasures’… With a huge array to choose from, our face masques are packed with the most delicious natural ingredients and are bursting with luscious fragrances. Suitable for all different skin types, there is one to suit every mood and everybody!

Montagne Jeunesse beauty treats are free of parabens, vegetarian approved and never tested on animals. So treat yourself today to a masque that will hydrate, nourish and leave your skin cleansed, smooth and glowing. Available at ULTA Beauty, Walgreen’s, Claire’s, Walmart, Kroger, CVS Pharmacies and other retailers across the US, these masques are available in a variety of succulent flavours, including:

• Cucumber Peel Off
• Passion Peel Off
• Dead Sea Mud
• Fruit Smoothie
• Strawberry Souffle
• Chocolate Mud
• And many more!

Montagne Jeunesse… good for your skin, your wallet and the earth!

Taking care of the written word, 

Dannielyn

Impressed with imPRESS Press-On Manicure

I received Space Cadet design imPRESS nails as a part of my Holiday Voxbox to try and let others know of their product. I love the manicure products quite a bit. I was not in love with the design I received. Nonetheless, I tried them on and loved how easy to put on and remove. I loved how long the nails lasted. The only problem outside the design I received was the color of the design rubbed off the ends of the nails and did not look so good. I would buy the product again, especially during the holiday season where baking and decorating was very rough on my own nails. Enjoy!


imPRESS Press-On Manicure

This changes everything!

Introducing imPress Press-On Manicure by Broadway Nails, the revolutionary way to apply polish! Featuring advanced nail technology, you can get a salon-perfect manicure in seconds – simply peel off, press on, and you're done. There's no drying, a killer shine and a manicure that lasts up to a week! And, imPress is so easy to remove, you can change it up to match your mood as often as you want. Check out all 36 colors and patterns, including trendy brights, classic darks and animal prints. With imPress, your nails will always be your best accessory.

imPress Manicure retails for $5.99 for colors and $7.99 for patterns, and is available at CVS, Rite Aid, Duane Reade, KMart, Walgreens, Walmart and more. For a full list of online and in-store retailers, visitimPressManicure.com, where you can download an exclusive coupon and virtually try on all the colors and patterns!

Taking care of the written word, 

Dannielyn

NYC New York Color Liquid Lipshine

I received a full size lipshine free in my Holiday VoxBox to try and tell others what I thought about the product. I have to admit, I was unsure of what to expect. I thought for sure I would have the lip gloss sticking my lips together or have lip gloss threads hanging from the top to the bottom lips. Well, I am thrilled to say that this product lives up to its claims. It is not sticky, brings great shine to my lips and comes in great shades. Look below at the company and product information and get some today. 

Straight from the city that never sleeps, NYC New York Color offers products with uptown style at down-to-earth prices, from $.99 - $4.99. The energy, style and color of New York City shines through the wide range of shades, textures and innovative products. NYC always delivers the most on-trend products & shades hot off the runway!

A beauty-editor favorite is Liquid Lipshine ($2.49). It has pure pigments that created a 3-D gloss effect. Vitamin E provides shine and a moisturizing feel. The formula is non-sticky, super shiny & soft. Available in 10 on-trend shades from neutral nudes, to berries & fuchsias. Start shopping for NYC at these stores nearest you: Walmart, Target, Rite Aid, CVS, Family Dollar, Duane Reade, Kmart, HEB, and others.  Visit newyorkcolor.com to check out all shades and fun products from New York Color!

Taking care of the written word, 

Dannielyn

Merry Christmas To All, The Frey Family Christmas Letter

Last Christmas we moved on December 17^th which meant unpacking the necessities took priority over unpacking and putting up Christmas decorations including a tree. It was a humbling year and the move only added to this humbling revelation. 

This year, what a year, look at the highlights that happened before and after a second move in April. Yep, thats right, we had to move just a few months later, Easter weekend, crazy I know.

·         A broken collarbone April 12^th, and surgery for our 16 year old April 19^th, moved April 22-24^th.

·         two broken vertebrae from a mountain biking accident for my husband on our wedding anniversary May19th

·         a surgery for me in July

·         Our 19-year-old son back in college for his second year trying to study, work, and pay college expenses due to less financial aid than the previous year. This despite the economic condition of our family had not changed from his first year. (Procrastination on his part for following up on financial stuff, yep, a great lesson learned). He has car issues, lost car and room keys, and other great things of that nature, ahh the joys of adulthood. Oh, and he bought a 1972 Volkswagen bug, 4 speed, which he had to learn how to drive the weekend we moved!!!!

We find the family excited about our Christmas traditions, again, and more completely than before this last year. We realized how tenuous our lives and the condition of our family are.

Andrew collided with another player during a Lacrosse game and had a horrific break on his collarbone. It was a jagged break, like a Z in a weird angle. One part of the bone poked the lining near his lung and the other part of the bone poked the muscle on his shoulder. He was on major painkillers during that time and cannot remember a lot of what happened during that time. Wow, but consider Andrew, an independent child (teenager) who was never really ill or injured now relied for his mom for everything (again). Food, beverages, pain medication, dressing, undressing, comfort, love, a sounding board for his pain and anger were now bringing him back to when he was just an infant needing his mother. I of course was thrilled. [For all parents of teenagers you know what I mean, the child you loved so much as a young child suddenly enters puberty and is horrible. He wants very little from his family and his family not wanting to be around the hormonal child either. You are grateful he has his room to escape too as you can also escape from him. Then suddenly the child is a man version of the little guy you loved so much before puberty]. For us, Andrew’s collarbone was our version of the prodigal child returning and realizing just how much his mother loved him and was willing to do all he needed to have done without holding a grudge for his past behavior. I consider that an incredible gift, one that I will cherish this Christmas. 

Mike struggled with a bit of guilt over the fact he was away for our anniversary on a mountain biking camping trip, received a concussion, and fractured vertebrae. He does not remember his moments of guilt; I believe it was due to the medication he was on. Yes, three of the four of us had recovery periods on some good painkillers. However, Mike realized just how much his family relied on him if we could no longer expect him to do the same things he had always done. This was a difficult time for me listening to him talk about the next time he goes on the same path he just crashed on. Of course, this was only a day or two after the accident and I really wanted him to take a few moments to understand with the accounts of the crash from eye-witnesses, the bike helmet, and the how he was injured he was lucky to be alive, walking, and not paralyzed. I will admit, I was not as understanding of this part of his recovery as I was sitting in the ER on my anniversary night. He fully recovered and for that, Christmas reminds us of the gifts we receive throughout the year.

Tony gave me a very special Mother's Day letter that spoke of his great learning he did in the first year of college about the sacrifices that I made throughout his life. He realized that while we may not always agree, there is a love that cannot be broken between us. A better gift than this I do not know what it could be. 

The year was not without other good things that often find their way into the annual Christmas letter. Andrew received his driver’s license in June, come December 15^th he will be able to drive past 9 pm and we are all thrilled about that. He was a very handsome young man in a tuxedo escorting Daphne as part of the homecoming court. Andrew inducted into the National Honor Society at North Henderson High School in November. He has a job at a beautiful cinema in Biltmore Park and works weekends (Friday and Saturday nights), not bad for a 17 year old.

Tony is in his second year of college at the University of North Carolina Charlotte. He is double majoring in Political Science and English (Journalism). He is doing really well at school and does enjoy the experience. Just yesterday (December 16), Tony is 5 credits from being a Junior. WOW! He is still working for Rue 21, however at the Charlotte store rather than in Hendersonville. During the summer, he may be back at the H’ville store, guess it depends if he stays in Charlotte for summer term. We are very proud of his successes and his growth as an incredible young man.

Mike is working at All Juice still and as long as the company remains open. He is often worried that the company may close the plant, but there are signs of a future (switching to a new insurance company and upgrading some of the equipment). The good news is that the insurance company switch will allow us $1200 in new orthodontics coverage to pay for Andrew’s braces. This is incredible news for our braces (Andrew) and college (Tony) funds. Mike tries to ride his bike as often as possible, but possible does not come as often as he hopes.

I am living a quiet life in Gerton as a freelance writer while the boys 3 are working and/or going to school. After the first half of the year, I need the quiet life. My freelance writing is going very well and what a huge relief. I looked back at all the work I completed since the beginning year and compared the amount of work with the ‘stuff’ happening in our lives at the time and I am not sure how I found the time to do all that I did. Yikes, no wonder I felt some stress this year.

 We were finally able to get television after trying Direct TV, Dish Network (second try worked), cable, antennae, and from Easter weekend in April to beginning of September without any television and very little options in way of radio. Internet is dial up with the hopes of DSL next summer. Yes, we are going back in way of technological progress to dial up, but it is faster than satellite internet and the only option at this time. I can use my smart phone to tether to my computer for internet access to a second computer. However, that was only since December 10, 2011. It gets lonely in Gerton and without out a car during the days, I am at home just the cats and me. We have three cars, four drivers, one in Charlotte, one driving 30 minutes to school (one way) and one driving 30 minutes to work (one way). I work from home, therefore….. This existence in Gerton has taught me many things of which, how fortunate our family really is.

So, if you think I was trying to gather feelings of pity from you, it is not the case. I look at what we have in a new way, not as a list of material things and status in society but as a way to understand the purpose of why we are a family. I remember the phone calls, facebook updates, and emails from family and friends and I see that friends and family too are struggling with the economy, family issues, health, employment, and contentment. I must admit I am more content now with the ability to stay connected through television and internet than I was when we first moved here and struggled obtaining both of them. Nevertheless, as I write about how our year has gone and focus on joys found in the midst of our trials, I think that I have been truly blessed this year despite or because of the struggles we have had.

So this Christmas, the family is full of joy despite the year of crud we have been through. We are making only those treats that are special to us and are not trying to match all the other expectations to top last year or two years ago. We are concentrating on the experiences rather than the gifts. That does not mean that I did not get them the coolest gifts, purchased in one day online and from the comfort of my home office with Christmas music elevating the mood even more. Our family wishes all of you and yours a year of blessings, strength for when the blessings are more than you feel you can handle, courage in times of fear, patience when anxious, contentment in all, and the love of Christ during this Christmas and in 2012.

Merry Christmas,

Michael, Dannett, Tony, and Andrew Frey