Tuesday, May 12, 2009

A Teenagers Mom

I have to admit that as a mother of a teenager, I have had to do less parenting than when they were younger and it is a lot easier to parent a teenager than it is a toddler or primary school age child. Yet, there are less problems and disciplining that I have to do.

I have to admit that I love my boys so very much. But I was strict with them; bedtimes, snack schedules, types of snacks, cleaning their rooms, learning to do chores, homework, manners, treating others with respect, and so much more.

My oldest son in Kindergarten would spend forever getting out of the school because he was always talking to others and being kind. While that was good that he was being kind to others, he held up the teachers and well, me and his brother and the children I cared for in my daycare. So, Tony, his teacher and I spoke one day and I told him that if he didn't start getting ready to leave school quickly he would lose privileges at home. I asked his teacher to remind him of the consequences. The teacher was willing to help as Tony was in AM kindergarten and she had lunch and preparing for the PM class to do before they arrived. Tony actually did very well with the setting of boundaries and found he had more fun when he got outside with the rest of his class and played before everyone left.

My youngest son had speech issues when he was younger and was due to some issues while in the womb. But anyways, Andrew was between two and three years old when this issue took place. We were at a restaurant and Andrew was being rude to the wait staff. Whether you have speech issues or not, being rude is not acceptable. He was taken to the bathroom with his father to "discuss" the issue. He came back and was told to apologize to the wait staff. He wouldn't. Another "discussion" took place. When he finally apologized for being rude, the wait staff was surprised. No other parent had ever made their child apologize for being rude.

We had the same "issue" take place two more times in two different restaurants. Same process took place, but after the third event of rudeness, Andrew was no longer rude to wait staff. Still isn't, he says please, thank you and will talk to them in many other ways than just giving orders.

My oldest son went to prom last weekend. He has a girlfriend that he was going with, but also five other girls that were in his group of friends. He drove our mini van and was a wonderful date, chauffeur and friend to all the girls in his group. I received a call from his girlfriend's mother telling me how charming and wonderful he was when he arrived. He opened the car door for her, was pleasant and gracious and wonderful.

I am a mother of two teenage boys. Both are doing wonderful in school, our youngest has gotten straight A's all year long, and I couldn't feel more blessed. I know it is due to God's direction in raising our children and because we were strict with love when they were younger.

As my oldest is about to become an adult in 8 months from now, I am looking at him not as much my son I need to parent but as my son who I am fortunate to become friends with more as time goes by.

Oh, there is a fine line between what kind of friend a parent and child can become, but I truly believe that there is much to look forward too.

I am enjoying being a mother of teenagers.

Struggling to become a lady of Proverbs 31!
Dannett

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